A Light For My Massive Black Hole!

I know today is March 2nd and I should be writing my second tribute, but I have become sidetracked. Besides, at the time I was going to write tribute #1, our Internet was down...

So, it's 3:30 in the morning and I am just piddling around. I'm at ease and content with the fact that I don't have to feel like I'm walking on eggshells. Michelle has found an apartment and is in the process of moving out of our basement. The kids can run, jump, stumble, scream; not that they didn't do that when she was here, but we always tried to wrangle them in for her sake. I can walk through the house at night without tip-toeing because I didn't want to disturb Michelle's sleep... Things are going to get back to business as usual around here... Ahhhhhhhh

But, that's not why I'm writing. I was trying to fix the Internet issue and when I sat down to see if my efforts worked, I noticed an infomercial. This infomercial was about a book called Transform Your Child by James Lehman. Yes, the informercial was completely cheesy, but as I kept watching I noticed a truth to what was being "depicted by actors."

In the paid programming, there were children screaming and shouting, being disrespectful, throwing tantrums, etc. In this informercial, I saw all the things that take place here in our house...

It's not a surprise to anyone that we have been struggling with Andrew's behavior both at home and school this past 1-3 years. It has really gotten worse this last year. In fact, it's become so bad that we have started seeing someone to help sort things out.

While watching this programming, they mention something called Oppositional Defiant Disorder . The symptoms listed for this are ALL the things we are seeing! This informercial has given me a renewed sense of strength and purpose.

For the past year, I have been feeling worthless and dejected because I have a son who can get out of control in less than 30 seconds. Think back to the movie, The Parenthood. There was a part in the movie where Steve Martin's son loses his retainer at his birthday pizza party and has a COMPLETE meltdown. That meltdown resulted in Steve Martin sifting through the dumpsters of the pizza place trying to find it. That's the kind of 180 Andrew can do....

I have been racking my brain for reasons why Drew is the way he is and kept coming up short every time. I have endured lectures and judgement from close family members and been made to feel like a bad mom. Our marriage had actually taken a severe beating because of this situation that we couldn't find a solution for. So, this program lifted my spirits, really.

I am going to do some more research about ODD and other diagnosises that surround it. In my heart, I feel like this is the beginning of our road to recovery. The things I saw on TV and what I have been reading this evening have given me hope for the future... I see a little light peeking at me on the other side... THANK GOODNESS!