3.30.2009

P/T Job

So, in an effort to better myself, I have applied for a part-time job. I am looking into being a tutor. I figured - I enjoy my job - most days ;-), I know how to teach curriculum in different ways, to different learners (except my son), and I have a WHOLE summer full of nothing to do... Why not get a P/T job?

Let me share a little something with you. You'll probably think I'm a horrible person, but who cares?

I don't think that I should have to volunteer or do anything extra with my spare time. I feel that teaching students in an urban community, with suburban like qualities is enough. For 9 months out of the year, I give my students, my classroom, my school and my school district MY ALL! Isn't that charity enough? Aren't I doing my part to make society a better place by providing a quality education to a multitude of children?

I could spend my summer working in a soup kitchen, or volunteering my time at a battered women's shelter, or some other heart-filling, rewarding task, but I don't. I don't think that makes me a selfish or bad person. Right now, I give what I can and teaching is all that I can give right now... Well, I give my old clothing to goodwill (and sometimes, the tags are still on), I buy things for my kiddos in the classroom, I donate money to causes....

So, in order to do something constructive with my time, I decided to apply for a job as a tutor. It's not the $$$ that interests me (although, it's a bonus), it's the fact that I can do something I'm good at all year round. Besides, when there is $$$ involved, the obligation is a little lighter on the shoulders. And right now, I don't need ANYTHING added to my load. I have quite enough with the children, the hubby, the sister, the job, the Master's courses, the guilt, the insecurity, the uncertainty, the emptiness, the dull ache, need I go on?

I don't think I have to volunteer, I feel like I do enough for now...

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