How hard is it to communicate? I swear! Arik and I need counseling. This whole house needs counseling!

This evening, I get an email that says some friends of ours are moving their daughter's bday party to tomorrow. Well, Aiden's bday brunch is tomorrow.

We both get the email. Arik reads it before me. Instead of making conversation and saying, "oh, hey, did you get that email from so-and-so? They aren't coming tomorrow because of the change in plans."

He gets all pissy with me because I am frustrated with the lack of conversation we have. All day I was thinking they might be coming and buy food, including them in my party count. Had Arik just said something instead of waiting for me to get the email, I could have spent less money on food.

Am I wrong for feeling this way? It's not about us both getting the email. It's about Arik wanting to talk to his wife and share tidbits of information that may or may not be important!

As the years pass, it pisses me off more and more. These days, we are so out of sync... I don't know how else to get him to see the importance of communcation. This is going to lead to our divorce...


Shelly said...

Lol! You are so dramatic. Maybe ya'll should set aside some mommy-daddy time where ya'll can talk. Ya'll both stressed...they joys of working while parenting. Take each day as it comes. 10 years ain't easy but it's been done. How bout 10 more! Gotta take time to reconnect that love.

Mrs. H. said...

Exactly. Listen to your L'il Sis. She has a valid point.

Set up regular date nights away from the children. Spend some extra time making that time special, ie, wear makeup, put on that outfit you feel sexy in, wear perfume, request he wear a shirt you love. Work on the dynamics of the relationship, re-connect, and you will find things flow a lot easier between the two of you. Converse, not nag. Compliment, not tear down. Be positive.

KatieJ said...

Most of us wish that we had husbands to fight with. Breathe! It will get better.

Desiree said...

You are hereby NOT allowed to join me in my misery - it's a bad place and people I care about are not allowed in! :-)

Communication is vital - don't give up. Please don't give up. Fight for your marriage, even if you don't feel like you should, even if you feel like he's not pulling his weight. Boys suck and it's not fair.

Fight for your marriage - it matters and so do you!

I'm giving you big huge snot-filled tear-stained hugs because that's all I've got right now! :-)

Amanda said...


Your friends & family above are ALL right! You need to ride this wave & continue to hang in there. Your marriage IS worth fighting for & sometimes we do have to work a little harder at it than should be necessary, but that is where the "for better for worse" part comes in.
Call a babysitter and calendar in a couple of days next month to give you & Arik some alone time to talk, to really check-in with eachother. Once you feel that you've made some headway in the relationship, move on to date nights. Good luck, I am rooting for you! :)
Amanda (Snider)

3 Guys and a Girl said...

Thanks, peeps! Even though this quirk in Mr. B drives me freakin' crazy, I've been here for 12 years and I'll be here for 12 hundred more.

I just need to blow off some steam so that I can clear space for the next round...

If he is reading this, I wish he would take a very obvious hint and brainstorm some solutions WITH me.


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