Soap Box

So, I'm really annoyed today. I'm sure it just an extension of the PMS symptoms I was feeling on Friday, but there's probably some truth behind why I'm annoyed, frustrated, pissed...

Arik is doing this car audio thing, right? It is annoying the hell out of me! Why? Because it was the first thing he thought of on the day of our eldest son's birthday party, it's what he thinks about doing while the baby is trying to nap (the sawing, drilling, banging, etc.), he wants to use money we don't really have to buy gargantuan woofers and tweeters, amps, whatever! I am so tired of this.

I'm glad that he's found a hobby, but why now? The economy is struggling right now and we are okay, but in the blink of an eye we could be out on our arses. I mean, didn't we just sit around a few months ago biting our fingernails, worrying about if he was going to keep his job? Then, worrying about if I was going to keep my job? This was part of the reason that I decided to get a part-time job. I'm trying to save up some more money.

Every month, our books say we should have plenty left over after the bills, but I just don't see us getting ahead... I have really put the breaks on my hobbies (scrapbooking, buying things for my classroom, and just shopping in general). I buy what we need. Do I ever know what Arik needs (other than $350 for a car audio part)? No! He doesn't express that to me. So, when I am out buying the boys and myself clothes to replace some of our most outdated things, I can't get him anything. He doesn't say anything about needing those types of things.

If he isn't caring, then why am I wasting time at the grocery store trying to talk my alter ego out of reaching for the brand name stuff? I swear, yesterday at Wal-Mart, I spent an extra 30 minutes there because I was thinking, "the off brand is so much cheaper. I should buy that, but what if it doesn't taste good? Maybe, I'll buy the cheaper brand of something else." I still ended up spending $287 at the store and 90% of what I bought was food. WTF???

I am just going through my very annoyed phase right now. It's quite the pissy mood, if I do say so myself...